Overheard in D.C.: Namesakes

Photo by Amberture Not everyone knows D.C. well; it’s not shocking. People come and go, they move here for work and go about their day and don’t really think about the city. Sometimes, however, you just wonder what the hell is going on in their brains. Overheard of the Week On the Red line at about 9 a.m. on Monday: A 20ish year old couple are riding the train as it pulls into the Dupont Circle station. Metro Operator: “Next stop: Dupont Circle.” Girl: “Dupont? I think Dupont is named after a mustard or something.” Guy: “Probably so. Who knows were they come up with these train stop names.” Girl: “Huh. Well, that is strange. They must like their mustard.” —— If you’re going to talk on the phone in the bathroom, you might as well go all out. In the men’s room of a Dupont Circle office building, around 11 a.m. on Friday: A man bursts through the door into the restroom talking loudly on his cell phone, then enters a stall and proceeds about his business: “Just brush your teeth… Honey, you threw up. Now go and brush your teeth…” —— Franc…onia? At Foggy Bottom Metro station: A family of tourists, about 8 people, come off a packed Orange line train. Parent: “We need to go to Springfield on the Blue Line.” Boy around 13 years old: “We almost went to Vienna. We almost went to France.” —— Creigh Deeds: loves the Devil. Outside the Harris Teeter in Alexandria: A man is giving a woman a bunch of “McDonnell for Governor” signs. Woman: “Thank you. You are doing God’s work.” —— Is it opposite day? On Amtrak: 20-something woman to guy: “My neighborhood is really cool. It’s like the next Bethesda.” —— That would be a way funnier protest Outside the Planned Parenthood on 16th Street: A group of protesters are holding a banner and

have written chalk pro-life messages all over the sidewalk. Protester with megaphone to passerby: “Sir, we’re going to perform a citizens’ arrest on you for wearing those sunglasses. Seriously people, don’t look at him.” —— Is it really that complicated? In the P Street Whole Foods on Sunday: Woman #1: “Ew feta, I don’t like feta… oh wait no, it’s goat cheese!” Woman #2: “Goat cheese? Great! I can’t eat dairy… oh wait, the package says it contains dairy products… never mind.” —— Sometimes it’s nice when tourists don’t know anything about the city On the Green Line at Gallery Place after a Nats game: A tourist family is on a train with dozens of people wearing Nats jerseys. Teenage tourist to father: “So, are the Nationals, like, good?” —— And sometimes it’s not. Waiting in line for tickets to enter Mt. Vernon last Saturday: A little boy points to the bronze profile of George Washington by the entrance: Little boy: “Look mom, it’s the guy on the penny!” Mother: “You’re right honey!” —— In his defense, he objected to the virus, but the judge overruled him. In Chinatown during lunchtime: Girl on cell phone: “You know, it doesn’t even really matter if he passes the Bar. He doesn’t have a job or any money. Besides, even if he eventually gets those things… you gotta remember he’ll always have herpes.” —— It’s not a NASA capsule. On the Mall during the Folklife festival: Tourist to Smithsonian employee: “Where is the Smithsonian?” Employee: “All around you. Which one do you want?” Tourist: “Smithsonian 1.” Employee: “Ma’am, do you want the Museum of Natural History, the American History Museum, the Air and Space Museum — which museum are you looking for?” Tourist: “Smithsonian 1.” Employee: “Ma’am, I work for the Smithsonian and i have never heard of Smithsonian 1.”

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Overheard in D.C.: Namesakes